Which of the following is an example of an I-message?

• A. I want to help, but you're really starting to scare me
• B. You're really causing trouble
• C. Please calm down
• D. Tell me more about the issue

Answer: (A)

I-messages express your own feelings and the impact of someone’s behavior, rather than blaming them. They start with “I” and describe how a behavior affects you, which helps keep the conversation constructive and reduces defensiveness.

The statement that fits this best uses “I” and clearly shares a feeling tied to the other person’s actions: “I want to help, but you’re really starting to scare me.” It communicates a willingness to engage (I want to help) and the emotional and practical impact (being scared by the behavior), which invites a cooperative response.

The other options don’t express your own feelings or impact in the same way, and thus aren’t true I-messages: they blame the other person, or simply make a directive or a neutral request without sharing how you feel.